Substandard Speling and Grammer is Yours!
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To the Lady in front of us at the midnight Wrangler's Game Last Night.

I realize that going to see the Las Vegas Wranglers play is NOT the same as paying a hundred bucks for a pair of tix to see the Sharks or the Avalanche or any other NHL team, but I do attend these games expecting to actually be able to watch the game unobstructed.

We noticed you two weeks ago, older-lady-with-the-bad-perm-from-1982, when we were sitting behing the benches. You had seats behind the goal, halfway up, and were shaking your old booty for all it was worth when it was time to pick the "Super Fan of the Night." We saw you on the Jumbotron, we saw you at your seat, we thought nothing of you.

This weekend we got a big group of freebies. Behind the goal. Roughly 10 rows behind you.

You started as soon as the National Anthem was over. Everyone sat down to get ready to watch the opening faceoff but you felt the urge! The urge to Dance! The need to express yourself through movement overcame you so strongly that you HAD to dance to the pulse-pumping tune that was being played before the drop of the puck.

I thought nothing of it at that point.

By the time we were halfway throught first period, though, it was painfully obvious to everyone in sections 108-111 that you are either completely off your fucking rocker or so completely obsessed with the need for attention that you behave in a manner that is totally out of line with normal hockey etiquette.

You are at a hockey game, not a dance club. If you feel the need to dance that fucking much, take off your wranglers fanwear, dig some slutty 80's outfit from your closet, and go to a dance club.


I don't want to miss every friggin faceoff to the right of the goal because you feel that its okay to dance until the music has completely faded out. I don't want to have to see you do the same 30 second slutty-axl-rose-impression at every. single. break. in. play.

I'm sorry that I waited until the last 5 minutes to get frustrated enough to yell "SIT DOWN" at your annoying jeans-clad ass.

You were in the same seats as the last game. Most likely you're a season ticket holder; or your husband/man/whatever is. You seemed to enjoy the actual play of the game when you weren't busy dancing or encouraging that little girl to incessantly blow that goddamn horn.

What compels you to disturb the view of everyone sitting directly behind you? Is it an attention thing? My best guesses are that you were either a poular prom-queen type in a really small high school, or you were the well known slutty blowjob queen at a really big one; you have to be the center of attention no matter how fucking annoying you're being to the people behind you actually trying to watch the game.

I'm not totally against people getting up and dancing and having a good time every so often, or more than every so often if they're a cute kid; but impeding the view of people who weer unfortunate to get stuck sitting behind you is just rude.

Sit the Fuck Down and let the rest of us enjoy the game, Dancing Lady.

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