Your Mom is so fat, the recursive function
computing her fatness causes a stack overflow.
Have you ever gone to see a movie and as you're walking out you say to yourself, "That was a good goddamn movie," and then you gab about it with your friends on your way to the car.
Saturday was a little different...
We watched the movie, for the most part stone still and eyes fixed on what was playing out in front of us with damn near total disbelief. The audience was almost sitting there as if it couldn't move because it didn't want to miss one bit of the film, no matter how unpleasant it got.
The movie ends, we get up and leave, go down the hall, up the Exit Stairway... but nobody, and I mean nobody, is saying a word. Not even the little punks who snuck in because they thought the flick was gonna be be coooool.
We had just seen why movies are really made.
Now, unless you've been living under a rock, you most likely know what Movie I'm talking about. For the less-than-swift, we went to see Saving Private Ryan last Saturday for a matinee. If you haven.t seen it, I highly reccommend you do, during the day, with a few friends.
I heard that it was bloody, that it was highly realistic, that it wasn't for kids, but GEEZ. They should put it as "This film makes Platoon look like Breakfast at Tiffany's". The gore and all isn't just thrown in there just so we can see a little blood and explosions just like all the other "summer action flicks", it's in there to put a point across:
War really sucks and the last place you want to be is in the middle of one, but when the time came, these men stood up and went beyond what was rational so that you - yeah, you, in the third row with your cute little "Fuck this Country" t-shirt" - can be whomever you want whenever you want adn say whatever you want.That's pretty much the underlying point that comes through. The critics have mostly been saying good things about the flick, though a few have cited the flatness of the supporting cast of characters, and the fact that some things are a little cliche in the beginning. I can understand that but for christ's sake, what do you want, another 45 minutes tacked on for character development?
I don't think the audience would have stood for it.
The effects and cinematography are outstanding, not that you'd notice it, you're a little preoccupied to be scouring the scene for technical details.
I'm even going to go as far as to say that if the Top 100 movie list would have come out later, this would have been on it, hands down. It's about the perfect blend of tech, story, and raw in your face "let me show you what its all about, for real".
And thats what makes it so damn good.
See it. See it. See it.
Its was the perfect movie experience...
Well, it should have been, EXCEPT FOR THE STUPID BITCH WITH HER CELLULAR PHONE!!!!!
While I was sitting there, totally into this movie, sitting in a dead silent audience, this girl's cellphone goes off and starts ringing.
It didn't ring just once, but TWICE, and then, just to totally push the stereotype that 20-somethings are moronic slackers, she answers the goddamn phone in the middle of the house with a normal tone of voice. So much for "being completely immersed in the movie"
Personally, I don't like cell phones, but I understand their use, but for the love of God PLEASE get enough brains in your head to know when to shut the fucking things off! Most people really have no need for them, and then they gotta leave them on all day long, no matter what the situation? I would think a good rule of thumb is: If you have the time to go to a movie nothing in your life is so pending that you can't be away from a phone for 2 or 3 hours.
Well, now that I'm totally disgusted with the fact that my movie mention turned into a diatribe about stupid people and their cell phones, I'm just gonna leave this hangin out there in space and wait for the next victim to find it.
Go see the movie, trust me.
28 July 1998
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